Quotes : If you cannot convince them, confuse them
If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; But if you really make them think, they'll hate you.
One thing you will probably remember well is any time you forgive and forget.
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
I have not lost my mind - it's backed up on disk somewhere
I have the heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf.
Don't you have an elsewhere to be
You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you.
We ask ourselves 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
It's not how much we give but how much love we put into giving.
-Mother Theresa
We cannot do great things on this earth. We can only do small things with great love.
Mother Theresa
It is never too late to be what you might have been.
-George Eliot
I have learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.
-Martha Washington
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me.'
-Erma Bombeck
You grow up at the day you have the first real laugh at yourself.
-Ethel Barrymore
Awful things can happen at any moment, so while they are not happening you may as well be pleased.
-Nigella Lawson
There are only two ways of spreading light--to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.
-Edith Wharton
Teachers open the door. You enter by yourself.
-Chinese Proverb
What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in others.
-Confucius
Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.
-Antoine de Saint-Exupery
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
-Mary Wilson Little
Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death.
-Harold Wilson
Never knock on Death's door: ring the bell and run away! Death really hates that!
-Matt Frewer
The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best.
-Will Rogers
If God had really intended men to fly, he'd make it easier to get to the airport.
-George Winters
Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three major categories - those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.
-Russell Baker
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
-Redd Foxx
No man is exempt from saying silly things; the mischief is to say them deliberately.
-Michel de Montaigne
I think on-stage nudity is disgusting, shameful and damaging to all things American. But if I were 22 with a great body, it would be artistic, tasteful, patriotic and a progressive religious experience.
-Shelley Winters
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?
-Abraham Lincoln
What's gone and what's past help
Should be past grief.
-William Shakespeare
Waste not fresh tears over old griefs.
-Euripides
Friendship is certainly the finest balm for the pangs of disappointed love.
-Jane Austen Northanger Abbey
I have no notion of loving people by halves it is not my nature.
-Jane Austen Northanger Abbey
I make it a rule never to mind what men say. They are very often amazingly impertinent if you do not treat them with spirit, and make them keep their distance.
-Jane Austen Northanger Abbey
An ounce of pretention is worth a pound of manure.
-Steel Magnolias
I heard you got so confused you wrote your dog out of your will and had an ungrateful nephew put to sleep.
-Steel Magnolias
There's so much static electricity in this place that I pick up everything except boys and money.
-Steel Magnolias
Laughter thru tears is my favorite emotion.
-Steel Magnolias
If you wish to know what a man is, place him in authority.
-Yugoslav Proverb
Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.
-Slovenian Proverb
If the wind will not serve, take to the oars.
-Latin Proverb
Never rely on the glory of the morning nor the smiles of your mother-in-law.
-Japanese Proverb
When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.
-Japanese Proverb
Fall seven times, stand up eight.
-Japanese Proverb
You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was.
-Irish Proverb
Call on God, but row away from the rocks.
-Indian Proverb
Don't fall before you're pushed.
-English Proverb
Do not protect yourself by a fence, but rather by your friends.
-Czech Proverb
Only the mediocre are always at their best.
-Jean Giraudoux
All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.
-James Thurber
I like life. It's something to do.
-Ronnie Shakes
A facility for quotation covers the absence of original thought.
-Lord Peter Wimsey
Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.
-Dr. Joyce Brothers
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
Napoleon Bonaparte
How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.
-Anne Frank
Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.
-Anne Frank
The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.
-Albert Einstein
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
-Dan Stanford
The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny...'
-Isaac Asimov
If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
-Robert X. Cringely
My home is not a place, it is people.
-Lois McMaster Bujold
Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it.
-Mahatma Gandhi
A woman is like a teabag, you never know how strong she is until you put her in hot water.
-Mae West
Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value.
-Albert Einstein
The release of atomic energy has not created a new problem. It has merely made more urgent the necessity of solving an existing one.
Albert Einstein
People find life entirely too time-consuming.
Stanislaw J. Lec
Men are generally idle, and ready to satisfy themselves, and intimidate the industry of others, by calling that impossible which is only difficult.
-Samuel Johnson
Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never tried.
-Mae West
Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make me laugh.
-W. H. Auden
The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we created them.
-Albert Einstein
It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
-Judith Martin
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well.
-Joe Ancis
We need a president who's fluent in at least one language.
-Buck Henry
After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.
-Cato the Elder
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
-Johnny Carson
The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he really is very good, in spite of all the people who say he is very good.
Robert Graves
The point of quotations is that one can use another's words to be insulting.
-Amanda Cross
You cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for war.
-Albert Einstein
You cannot make a man by standing a sheep on its hind legs. But by standing a flock of sheep in that position you can make a crowd of men.
-Max Beerbohm
People that are really very weird can get into sensitive positions and have a tremendous impact on history
-Dan Quayle
I used to think it was a terrible thing that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'what if life *were* fair, and all of the terrible things that happen to us came because we really deserved them?' Now I take great comfort in the general unfairness and hostility of the universe.
-Marcus Cole
Sometimes when I'm sitting in class... You know, I'm not thinking about class, 'cause that would never happen. I think about kissing you. And it's like everything stops. It's like, it's like freeze frame. Willow Kissage.
-Oz
Does it hurt your back to kiss your own ass like that
-Will and Grace
The denunciation of the young is a necessary part of the hygiene of older people, and greatly assists in the circulation of their blood
-Logan Smith
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
-Benjamin Disraeli
DELUSION, n. The father of a most respectable family, comprising Enthusiasm, Affection, Self-denial, Faith, Hope, Charity and many other goodly sons and daughters
We are surprised at our own versatility in being able to fail in so many different ways.
-Samuel McChord Crothers
For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off.
-Johnny Carson
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
-Oscar Wilde
KLEPTOMANIAC, n. A rich thief.
-Ambrose Bierce
Honesty pays, but it doesn't seem to pay enough to suit some people.
-F. M. Hubbard
I don't mind what language an opera is sung in so long as it is a language I don't understand.
Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one's own opinion.
-Ambrose Bierce
I have only one superstition. I touch all the bases when I hit a home run.
-Babe Ruth
Accident, n.: A condition in which presence of mind is good, but absence of body is better
CLARINET, n. An instrument of torture operated by a person with cotton in his ears. There are two instruments that are worse than a clarinet -- two clarinets.
-Ambrose Bierce
Sarchasm = The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
Hipatitis = Terminal Coolness.
Testosterone is a great equalizer. It turns all men into morons
-Giles
I like using big words. I just don't always know how to spell them.
-Me
Shake Shake the ketchup bottle none will come and then alot'll
-Kate and Leopald
If a man washes a dish and there's no woman to see it did it happen?
-Kate and Leopald
BS is bullshit, MS is more of the same and a PhD is piled high and deep.
-My marketing Professor
Harry: If you could take him back right now would you?
Sally: NO! (sob) But why didn't he want to marry me!?
-When Harry Met Sally
I think I'm coming down with that 24 hour tumor that's been going around
-When Harry Met Sally
The best thing you've got going for you is your willingness to humiliate yourself
-As Good As It Gets
Carole: Why can't I have just a normal boyfriend. One who doesn't go nutso on me
Her Mom: We all want that dear. But they don't exist.
-As Good As It Gets
You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'."
-Chris Rock
Family can be more than the people you're biologically connected to--it can include everyone you've chosen to love
-Jennifer Weiner
A closed mouth gathers no feet
You may only be one person to the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
Commit a sin twice and it will not seem a crime.
Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something.
-Plato
Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.
-George Carlin
Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that's why I don't have a boyfriend.
-Lucy Liu
Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He wasn't even the star of his own Halloween special.
-Chris Rock
A lot of people are afraid to say what they want. That's why they don't get what they want.
-- Madonna
I wish people could acheive what they think would bring them happiness in order for them to realize that that's not what happiness really is.
-Alanis Morisette
What luck for rulers that men do not think.
-Adolf Hitler
Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you 50,000 dollars for a kiss and 50 cents for your soul.
-- Marilyn Monroe
I used to live in a room full of mirrors; all I could see was me. I take my spirit and I crash my mirrors, now the whole world is here for me to see.
-- Jimi Hendrix
It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no Senator's son, son. It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no fortunate one.
- - Creedence Clearwater Revival, Fortunate Son
Men like war: they do not hold much sway over birth, so they make up for it with death. Unlike women, men menstruate by shedding other people's blood.
-Lucy Ellman
The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations.
-David Friedman
There is nothing that war has ever achieved that we could not better achieve without it.
-Henry Havelock Ellis
Some guys just can't hold their arsenic
-Cell Block Tango, Chicago
I like your costume too. Though when I dress up as a frigid bitch I try not to look so constipated
-Legally Blond
Behind every successful man is a surprised mother-in-law
These funnel cakes are kicking my ass
-Andrew, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Hairy legs are your only link to reality
I may be love's bitch but at least I'm man enough to admit it
-Spike
Its a moo point. You know like a cow's opinion. It doesn't matter. It's moo.
-Joey, Friends
people are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Love them anyway
-Mother Teresa
Dance like it hurts. Love like you need the money. Work when people are watching
-Dilbert
straight girl? gay girl? an orgasm's an orgasm
-Kissing Jessica Stein
Does it bother you that I'm bleeding right now
-Boys and Girls
I will be there to soften your fall and I will be there thru the think of it all. I will not let you feel you wasted all your time. When every day we had is one more day when you were mine
-Nine Days, Still Here
Tact is just not saying true stuff
-Cordelia
Me up at does
out of the floor
quietly stare
a poisoned mouse
still who alive
is asking What
have I done that
you wouldn't have
-ee cummings
I swear I'll never let in my direction
a gentlemen in full erection
I'll sit at home in sheerest silk
sweet scented skin as white as milk
and if he tries to have me I'll say no
I'll kick and scream I'll struggle so
No legs arch high touch the ceiling
No doggy crouch for extra feeling
and if I yeild and break this vow
No wine for me but water now
-Lysistrata
Inside me there's a thin woman crying to get out...but I can usually shut the bitch up with cookies
What's at the end of a million? zero zero zero. Nothing. A circle with a hole in it
-Sabrina
Hey... I’ve been turned into a cow... can I go home?
-Emperor’s New Groove
If [Everyone] insists on Christmas Gift Tax to ruin everything why not make it that everyone must go out and spend $500 on themselves then distribute the items among their relatives and friends to wrap up and give to them instead of this psychic-failure torment?
-Helen Fielding, Bridget Jones’s Diary
...and talk nicely to perverts with the word ‘uncle’ before their name while they stare freely at your breasts.
-Helen Fielding, Bridget Jones’s Diary
The worst is the thought that they tried you out and, in the end, the whole sum of parts adds up to you got stamped REJECT...
-Helen Fielding, Bridget Jones’s Diary
I’m only paranoid because there trying to kill me
-Conspiracy Theory
Bad llama
-Emperor’s New Groove
My Shoulder Angel
-Emperor’s New Groove
Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is?
-Frank Scully
It’s true I do imbue my blue unto myself I make it bitter
-Fiona Apple
I’m sensitive and I’d like to stay that way
-Jewel
If you bother to ask someone’s advice, then bother to listen
-Sophie Kinsella, Confessions of a Shopaholic
But its not the same when everything has changed
-Nine Days
Bounty in a box. It’s Bounty. In a Box.
-Bounty commercial
This mind, this body, and this voice cannot be stifled by your deviant ways
-Fiona Apple
When opportunity knocks open the door, even if your in your bathrobe.
-Heather Zschock
What looks like crazy on an ordinary day looks like love in the moon light
-Pearl Cleage, What Looks Like Crazy
If you lived here you’d be home now.
-Suzanna Kaysen, Girl, Interrupted
That’s another one for exotic bird bingo
-Emperor’s New Groove
Failure is an excellent teacher
-Forces of Nature
All paths lead to God
-Madonna
I think I might fly today just to disprove all the things that you say
-Jewel
Beware of the groove
-Emperor’s New Groove
I love knowing that such a tiny person can take up so much space in the world
-Stephen McCauley, The Object of My Affection
Lie to me, I promise I’ll believe. Lie to me, but please don’t leave.
-Sheryll Crow
The peasant...In the diner...He didn’t pay his check.
-Emperor’s New Groove
Nothings true and nothings right, so let me be alone tonight. Cuz you can’t change the way I am. Are you strong enough to be my man?
-Sheryll Crow
I want your warm but it will only make me colder when its over.
-Fiona Apple
I was having a sweet fix of a day dream of a boy whose reality I knew was a hopeless to be had
-Fiona Apple
I may be dead but I’m still pretty
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer
I’m seventeen looking at linoleum makes me think about sex.
-Buffy the Vampire Slayer
You fondle my trigger then you blame my gun
-Fiona Apple
Never do business with a man that cheats on his wife
-Life’s little instructions
Always check for paper before sitting down
-Life’s little instructions
Hell hath no fury like a woman scorn
You say love is a hell you cannot bear. So I say give me mine back and then go there for all I care
-Fiona Apple
Jesus didn’t speak English
-Collective Soul
Cuz the chains which once held us are only the chains which we made
-Jewel
Like flipping a coin, don’t matter what side it lands on its someone else’s dime
-Jewel
What we call human nature in actuality is human habit
-Jewel
unbeingdead isn’t beingalive
-E.E. Cummings
We don’t learn from the good things in life. We learn from the hardships
I’ve been thinking that it might do some good if we robbed the cynics and took all there food. That way what they believed would have taken place and we could give it to everyone who’d have some faith
-Jewel
Only the gentle are ever really strong
-James Dean
Never say ‘taste this see if it’s bad’
-Forget Paris
In darkness the stone becomes the buffalo, but in sunlight all is as is.
Speak softly and carry a big stick
-someone in Africa
Nature has a funny way of breaking what does not bend.
-Jewel
A life without love is no life at all
-Ever After
Hitler loved little blue eyed boys and it drove him to hate
-Jewel
If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.
-J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Never is a Promise
-Fiona Apple
You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you knew how seldom they do
When the pawn hits the conflicts he thinks like a king what he knows throws the blows when he goes to the fight and he'll win the whole thing 'fore he enters the ring there's no body to batter when your mind is your might and when you go solo you hold your own hand and know that depths is the greatest of heights and if you know where to stand then you'll know where to land and if you fall it won't matter cuz you'll know that your right.
-Fiona Apple
There is some dignity about an acquirement, because it is a product of your own labor
-Mark Twain
Praise is well, compliment is well, but affection -- that is the last and final and most precious reward that any man can win, whether by character or achievement
-Mark Twain
Change is the handmaiden nature requires to do her miracles with
-Mark Twain
Never believe anything until it has been officially denied
-Claud Cockburn
You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake
-Jeanette Rankin
Assert your right to make a few mistakes. If people can’t accept your imperfections that’s their fault
Behind almost any woman you’ve ever heard of, lies a man who let her down.
-Naomi Bliven
Whenever I hear ‘It can’t be done’ I know I’m close to success
-Michael Flatley
Complain to one who can help you
-Yugoslav Proverb
As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well used brings happy death
-Da Vinci
Wisdom doesn’t always come with old age. Nothing does -- except wrinkles. It’s true, some wines improve with age, but only if the grapes were good in the first place.
-Abigail Van Buren
When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign: that all the dunces are in confederacy against him
-Jonathan Swift
I never believed in Santa Claus because I knew no white dude would ever come into my neighborhood after dark.
-Dick Gregory
When you hire people smarter than you, you prove you are smarter than they are.
-R.H. Grant
A man who doesn’t read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them
-Mark Twain
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men
-Martin Luther King Jr.
Never be haughty to the humble; Never be humble to the haughty
-Jefferson Davis
Before we set our hearts to anything let us examine how happy those people are who already possess it
-Francois de la Rochefoucauld
I dwell in possibilities
-Emily Dickinson
Most men do not mature they simply grow taller
-Leo Rosten
There are very few people who don’t become more interesting when they stop talking
-Mary Lowry
Who would ever think that so much would go on in the soul of a young girl
-Anne Frank
My father was often angry when I was most like him
-Lillian Hellman
I think, therefore, I’m single
-Liz Winston
Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex... it takes a touch of genius - and a lot of courage - to move in the opposite direction
-Albert Einstein
Cynicism is knowing the price of everything and the value of nothing
-Oscar Wilde
The important thing is not to stop questioning
-Albert Einstein
The big thieves hang the little ones
-Czech Proverb
Even if your on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there
-George Bernard Shaw
He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas of anyone I ever met
-Abraham Lincoln
Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn’t block traffic
-Dan Rather
Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everyone agrees its old enough to know better
Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time for that’s the stuff life’s made of
-Ben Franklin
Rest satisfied with doing well and let others talk of you as they please
-Pythagoras
To me old age is always 15 years older than I am
-Bernard M. Baruch
Be honorable yourself if you wish to associate with honorable people
-Welsh Proverb
Man forgives woman anything save the wit to outwit him
-Minna Antrim
Hold a true friend with both hands
-Nigerian Proverb
When women go wrong men go right after them
-Mae West
To know the road ahead ask those coming back
-Chinese Proverbs
Nothing happens to anybody which he is not fitted to bear
-Marcus Aurelius
Those who don’t know how to weep with their whole hearts, don’t know how to laugh either
-Golda Meir
Never tell evil of a man if you do not know it for certainty; and if you know it for certainty then ask yourself why should I tell?
-Jon Lavater
Even on the highest throne in the world we are still sitting on our ass
-Michael de Montaigne
The most wasted day of all is that during which we have not laughed
-Sebastian Chamfort
If you don’t like something change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude about it. Don’t Complain!
-Maya Angelou
The person you consider ignorant and insignificant is the one who came from God, that he might learn bliss from grief and knowledge from gloom
-Kahlil Gibran
Health is not valued until sickness comes
Louis, Have you ever just tried clearing your throat?
-Billy Crystal’s grandmother to Louis Armstrong
Most people ignore most poetry because most poetry ignores most people
-Adrian Mitchell
There are no rules here! We are trying to accomplish something
-Thomas Edison
Those who wish to appear wise among the foolish, appear foolish among the wise
-Marcus Fabius Quintilamus
Wait until it is night before saying that it has been a fine day
-French Proverb
Life does not cease to be funny when people die, anymore then it ceases to be serious when people laugh
-George Bernard Shaw
Everything you can imagine is real
-Pablo Picasso
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives
-Abba Eban
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing
-George Bernard Shaw
Never forget that only dead fish swim with the stream
-Malcolm Muggeridge
Better to light a candle then curse the darkness
-Chinese Proverb
Ratio of Americans who die from tobacco-related illnesses each year to the number who are murdered: 17:1
-Sept issue of Harper’s Index
Enjoy every minute, there is plenty of time to be dead
Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong
-John Riefenbaker
Heroism consists of hanging on one minute longer
-Norwegian Proverb
The price of Greatness is Responsibility
-Churchill
You can’t underestimate the power of fear
-Tricia Nixon
Women should be judged by how much thought they put into there emotions; Men by how much emotions they put into their thought
Some people start out on third base and spend their whole lives thinking they hit a triple
I could have missed the pain but I would have had to miss the Dance
-Garth Brooks
You don’t have to sit outside in the dark; if however, you want to look at the stars, you will find that darkness is necessary. But the stars neither require nor demand it.
-Annie Dillard, Teaching a Stone to Talk
Rationalize the heart out of your life
You cannot rationalize you can only live the moment
You never really understand a person until you risk friendship with that person
-McIntosh
More good things in life are lost by indifference than ever were lost by active hostility
-Robert Gordon Menzies
Apathy is the glove in which evil slips its hand
-Bodie Thoene
It is a perplexing and unpleasant truth that when men have something worth fighting for, they do not feel like fighting.
-Eric Hoffer
There is nothing harder than the softness of indifference
-Juan Montalvo
The tragedy of modern man is not that he knows less and less about the meaning of his own life but that it bothers him less and less
-Vaclav Havel
Crime expands according to our willingness to put up with it
-Barry Farber
A guy falls into a hole. There’s no way out. Then a doctor walks by. The guy yells "hey I’m trapped down here can you help me out." The doctor writes a prescription throws it down then walks away. Then a priest walks by. The guy shouts out again, "Father, I’m trapped down here can you help me." The priest writes him a prayer tosses it down then walks away. Then a friend walks by. The guy yells, "It’s me can you help me outta here." Then the friend jumps into the hole with him. The guys says "what did you do that for now we’re both stuck in here." "Yes" the friend said, "but I’ve been here before and I know the way out"
-The West Wing
Most people pass over [into insanity] incrementally, making a series of perforations in the membrane between here and there until an opening exists
-Susanna Kaysen, Girl, Interrupted
Everything in the world is just the shadow of some real thing we cannot see
-Plato
Whatever had driven her whispered ‘Die!’
-Susanna Kaysen Girl, Interrupted
I looked down at the ripples of woven rags in our carpet, feeling more and more like a girl, and it was excruciating
-Rene` Steinke The Fires
Winds love a polished mirror above all, it is there that they lurk for the weak of heart, who come gazing in search of answers.
-Lia Nirgad, As High as the Scooter Can Fly
Because that’s the kind of Queen I am, the kind I choose to be.
-Lia Nirgad, As High as the Scooter Can Fly
I’d rather weep my heart out every night then go on freezing inside
-Lia Nirgad, As High as the Scooter Can Fly
Apology: laying the ground work for a future mistake
-Ambrose Bierce, Devil’s Dictionary
Stupid men are the only ones worth knowing after all
-Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice
Every now and then I feel like I've gotta bite someone
-Snoopy, You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown
Prince Charming’s a dick, bring on the frogs
-Drive Me Crazy
It is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye.
-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
The harder you fall, the higher you bounce.
Do not the most moving moments of our lives find us without words?
-Marcel Marceau
In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on.
-Robert Frost
People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
-Abraham Lincoln
Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars.
-Les Brown
Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.
-Ed Cunningham
The future depends on what we do in the present.
-Mahatma Gandhi
Our real blessings often appear to us in the shapes of pains, losses and disappointments; but let us have patience, and we soon shall see them in their proper figures.
-Joseph Addison
Fear less, hope more;
Whine less, breathe more;
Talk less, say more;
Hate less, love more;
And all good things are yours.
The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it.
-Moliere
When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.
-Charles A. Beard
You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.
-ZIGGY
if we wait for the moment when everything, absolutely everything is ready, we shall never begin.
-Ivan Turgenev
Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.
-Lucille Ball
The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.
-Lily Tomlin
You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don’t try.
-Beverly Sill
You will never find time for anything. If you want the time, you must make it.
-Charles Buxtons
There are no short cuts to any place worth going.
-Source Unknown
The measure of a man’s real character is what he would do if he knew he would never be found out.
-T.B. Macaulay
The greatest weakness of most humans is their hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they’re still alive.
-O.A. Battista
Sticks and stones are hard on bones
Aimed with angry art,
Words can sting like anything
But silence breaks the heart.
-Suzanne Nichols
The only place you’ll find success before work is in the dictionary.
-May B. Smith
We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.
-Anais Nin
One who makes no mistakes never makes anything.
Whatever is worth doing at all is worth doing well.
-Lord Chesterfield
Sticks and stones can indeed break bones, but words can often do worse. They can stifle destroy and mutilate all of the beautiful, hopeful things inside of us.
-Mawi Asgedom, Of Beetles and Angels
His love knew absolutely no shame
-Mawi Asgedom, Of Beetles and Angels
libee migbar, or developing a heart
-Mawi Asgedom, Of Beetles and Angels
Our rules demanded that we would never add hurt to the hurting
-Mawi Asgedom, Of Beetles and Angels
for even the most horrifying memories are you; they are yours and no one else’s. And they, along with the good memories, are your life.
-Mawi Asgedom, Of Beetles and Angels
We refer to them [the elderly] in the plural, never the singular, for they have the wisdom and deserve the respect of many.
-Mawi Asgedom, Of Beetles and Angels
It's funny how the earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to.
-Xander
Okay, on sleazing extra candy: tears are key. Tears will normally get you the double-bagger. You can also try the old 'you missed me' routine, but it's risky. Only go there for chocolate. Understood?
-Xander giving out Trick-or-Treating tips
Sore thumbs. Do they stick out? I mean, have you ever seen a thumb and gone, 'Wow! That baby is sore!'
-Willow
And then I was being chased by an improperly filled-in answer bubble screaming, 'none of the above!’
-Buffy
Fate is like checkpoints along the path that you're pre determined to take. The end is the same, but the journey is optional.
-Tere
We are worth more then the worst thing we’ve ever done
-Sister Helen Prejean
Sweetie, those books have no place in a public school library. Especially now. Any student can waltz in there and get all sorts of ideas. Do you understand how that terrifies me?
-Joyce, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.
-Anthony Burgess
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
-Henry J. Kaiser
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
-Robert Benchley
There is no fun in having nothing to do. The fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all.
-Sam Ewing
The past is to be dropped not because it is bad but because it is dead.
-Anthony De Mello
“Why is everyone here so happy except me?” “B/c they have learned to see goodness and beauty everywhere,” said the master. "Why don't I see goodness and beauty everywhere?" "B/c you cannot see outside of you what you fail to see inside.”
-Anthony De Mello
Life is like a motor car. A motor car can be used to travel to the heights. But most people lie in front of it, allow it to run over them, then blame it for the accident.
-Anthony De Mello
It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.
Muhammad Ali
I never said most of the things I said.
Yogi Berra
Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
Yogi Berra
I wish I had an answer to that because I'm tired of answering that question.
Yogi Berra
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.
Yogi Berra
It's like deja-vu, all over again.
Yogi Berra
The future ain't what it used to be.
Yogi Berra
You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.
Yogi Berra
A person who doubts himself makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
Ambrose Bierce
Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.
Ambrose Bierce
To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
Ambrose Bierce
Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
Ambrose Bierce
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
Ambrose Bierce
Egotism, n: Doing the New York Times crossword puzzle with a pen.
Ambrose Bierce
Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
Ambrose Bierce
Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.
Ambrose Bierce
Years and sins are always more than owned.
-Italian Proverb
Luck is not chance, it's toil; fortune's expensive smile is earned.
-Emily Dickinson
If everyone is thinking alike then somebody isn't thinking.
-George S. Patton (World War II General)
Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.
-Frank Zappa
If you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
- Homer Simpson
I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
This thing we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down.
- Mary Pickford
Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.
- H. Jackson Brown
True friends stab you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
Men say of women what pleases them; women do with men what pleases them.
- DeSegur
Whatever women do, they much do twice as well as men to be half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
- Charlotte Whitton
If you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
- Dorothy Parker
